Collective Trauma as a Gateway for Connection

Can you feel it? That uncomfortable medley of emotions that blends the energies of rage, depression, denial, numbness, and anxiety together that sits as one big chaotic swirling energetic mass in the pit of our abdomen? Yes, I feel it too. We all do.

 Whether experienced individually or collectively, traumatic experiences like the one we are in now undoubtedly transform the very fabric of our being. For better or worse, trauma alters every aspect of who we are and how we live our lives moving forward. Whether we heal from such traumatic experiences ultimately depends on how others meet us in our state of trauma (and how we meet ourselves). If in our state of trauma we receive adequate support, validation, and compassionate understanding our ability to recover from such trauma is enhanced greatly. If on the other hand our traumatic experiences are minimized, diminished, invalidated, and denied we are more likely to stay in a state of perpetual trauma (aka post traumatic stress disorder, PTSD) where parts of us remain (consciously or subconsciously) perpetually crying out for help, safety, and rescue.

I have both witnessed and experienced the profound healing that is possible at the level of mind, body, and soul when we heal and release the traumatic experiences that are stored within our bodies. If we want to be truly free from our pain and our past, we must learn to allow ourselves to feel rather than suppress those not so welcomed emotions that deplete our life force energy (i.e. fear, impatience, anger, anxiety) so that we can release them and their ability to otherwise reek havoc on our minds, bodies, and souls. We must reprogram our mind’s reflexive desire for control and our body’s reflexive activation of our sympathetic nervous so that we don’t continue living under the spell and illusion of persistent threat. To truly heal, we must receive the support and guidance we need to effectively learn how to hold ourselves and each other in and through our pain from a place of embodied compassion, love, forgiveness, and authentic hope.

 Over the next few weeks and months (possibly years) reality will most likely continue to knock us in and out of our senses to the point where a simple question like “How are you?” remains without a simple answer. This is normal and expected. Each time we experience something new that is traumatic, our experience is compounded by any and all of our pasts traumas that are unresolved. Be kind and gentle with yourself and others during this time because the level of trauma that you, a loved one, or a stranger is experiencing could be much bigger than what meets the eye.

So the next time someone asks you “How are you?”, I invite you to not cut yourself short by giving him or her a one-word answer. Do not allow yourself to be seduced to the idea that minimizing your discomfort in the moment or pretending that everything is okay when it isn’t will somehow magically make your experience go away. Instead allow yourself to feel and express the entirety of your emotional experience and experience the beauty, connection, and sense of peace that occurs when you allow yourself to be met in solidarity, vulnerability, and authenticity.

May the long-time sun
Shine upon you
All love surround you
And the pure light
Within you
Guide your way on